Kleptomania
by Queen of the Rogues
Summary: A rewrite of The Queen of Thieves: Hermione Granger was no thief, no criminal... just a God's only daughter with a fondness of pretty baubles and witchcraft. Was that so hard to believe?


**Jinx~ ah, the long awaited rewrite of _The Queen Of Theives_, yes you have all been very patient in my time of laziness. Terribly sorry, plus I still haven't read the books so I'm going to have to wing it and watch the movies a million times. There have been major tweaks to the story, beginning with the coupling decisions. **

**Your options are either-**

**Percy  
Nico  
or  
Luke**

**World domination has surprisingly not happened yet, so here is my disclaimer.**

* * *

"I thought you didn't want anything to do with me."

His smirk was smug, how she wanted to bat it right off of his arrogant mug.

"I don't."

His features twisted slightly in confusion.

"Then why-"

"I'm pregnant." Jeanette Granger stated bluntly and with the pleasure only a scorned woman can have, the smirk slipped right from his thin lips. Baby blue eyes which matched the skies widened, his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. It was then which Jeanette flashed him a wicked grin which made him sigh in relief, until she shoved her pregnancy test on the table in front of him. He quietly sat down, the test laying there- mocking him with the pale pink plus lit up on the tip. She watched him from across the room with a mean glint in her eye that Hermes had always found attractive about her. Right now though, he felt how she did whenever his crooked smile was lifted. Weary, cautious, like he was treading on eggshells. Which in all honesty he was at the moment.

"Girl or boy?" He asked her, watching as she walked away from him and headed into the small kitchen of the flat. She seemed to know these kinds of things, on instinct and it was the thing which drew him to her like a moth to a flame. Her need to be correct, her persistence, her courage and cunning nature all meshing in to make Jeanette Granger. He watched her for another moment, his gaze raking up and down in a lewd manner before he stood up. Long strides taking him to the kitchen doorway, he watched her place a hand on her stomach and the love that was already there for the unborn child. Her smile lighting up her pretty features as she turned towards him, his breathing shuttering and deciding to leave him on his own for a moment.

"It's gonna be a girl."

"You seem pretty sure about that 'luv." His crooked smile grew and he leant forward, wrapping an arm around her waist and staring down into her coffee coloured eyes. Sarcastic smile tainting those pretty features, he grinned cheekily at the bad influence he'd been over the young woman.

"As sure as your hand breaking if you don't remove it from my person."

"Harsh Jean."

"You're a God, you'll get over it."

* * *

_Ducking under Peeves, they ran for their lives, right to the end of the corridor where they slammed into a door which just so happened to be locked. Just their luck._

_"This is it!" Ron moaned as they pushed helplessly at the door, his unnecessary comments grinding on Hermione's last nerve "We're done for! This is the end!"_

_They could hear footsteps, Filch running as fast as he could toward Peeves's shouts._

_"Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She reached round and plucked a pin from the mass of curls upon her head, pressing it into the keyhole and fiddling with said lock for a moment. She had hoped that the locking charms would be ineffective against muggle tricks. The click of freedom, the lock opening was her answer as she shoved the door open and dragged the boys inside. Slamming it behind her and pressing her ear against the door._

* * *

_Buckbeak soared straight into the dark abyss of the night's sky. Harry gripped his flanks with his knees, the feel of his great wings rising powerfully beneath them. Hermione having a loose hold onto Harry, her head lolled back as she basked in the wind coursing past her. The speed going to her head with the giddy smile she wore._

_Harry encouraged Buckbeak forward, trying to gain momentum as they slid quietly past the upper floors of the castle. Harry pulled hard on the left-hand side of the rope, and Buckbeak turned._

_"Whoa!" he said, pulling backward as hard as he could._

_Buckbeak slowed down and they found themselves at a stop, unless you counted the fact that they kept rising up and down several feet as the Hippogriff beat his wings to remain airborne._

_"He's there!" Harry said, spotting Sirius as they rose up beside the window. He reached out, and as Buckbeak's wings fell, was able to tap sharply on the glass._

_Black looked up. Harry saw his jaw drop. He leapt from his chair, hurried to the window and tried to open it, but it was locked._

_"Get closer!" Hermione said to Harry, as he did so she took out her handy purse filled with pins and other lock picking devices she had been given for Christmas. With little warning, she slung her leg over Buckbeak and leaped onto the windowsill, working on the lock in a rapid motion._

_"C'mon, c'mon!"_

_The window sprang open._

_"How - how -?" said Black weakly, staring at the Hippogriff._

_"Get on - there's not much time," said Harry, gripping Buckbeak firmly on either side of his sleek neck to hold him steady as Hermione climbed back on. Patting the Hippogriff's feathers in affection, Hermione resumed her loose hold of Harry's waist. "You've gotta get out of here -the Dementors are coming back"_

* * *

"Hermione Jean Granger, huh?" Hermes muttered, holding the small baby in his arms and staring down at her with a crooked smile. The tiny hand wrapped around his considerably larger finger, the pallor of the baby's powdered skin against his natural tan. His gaze leaving his daughters to clash with Jean's, her flushed cheeks and heaves of her chest but she still looked beautiful to him no matter what. "The irony's killing me here."

"She'd have to have some part of her Dad," Jean murmured quietly with a shrug, taking the small child as Hermes handed her back. He wanted to turn and leave, inform Zeus and just leave it be but the baby still held a grip on his digit. Hermione held his finger, his daughter. He gazed down once again at the baby girl held tight within his love's arms.

"Something tells me she's gonna have a lot of adventures, our little Trickster."

* * *

**Jinx~ Quite a pathetic prologue but there you have it, do with what you will- reveiws would be nice though.**


End file.
